2nd PLACE WINNER

Author: SHEPARD

Addiction. What is it? Why is it a thing? Why is it so common? I, as well as millions of others on this planet, have asked these questions repeatedly. I’ve laid awake many nights pondering the answer to these questions, as I’m sure many others have. I've come up with plenty of theories, but I've always had the feeling that they never really hit the nail on the head. My thoughts are surely very different from others, but I have a mind and an opinion for a reason. Here is what addiction means to me.

What is addiction? While I'd love to say that I know what it really is, I can’t. When it comes to something like addiction, there are many different interpretations of what it means. There is the dictionary definition, but how the definition is worded in the dictionary may not be what everyone feels like addiction truly means. Merriam Webster states that addiction means “a strong inclination to do, use, or indulge in something repeatedly.” To your average Joe, this would seem like a sensible definition, but not me. Addiction is a coping mechanism. We all need to cope with our troubles in one way or another and some people fall into holes that lead to addictions. There are many types of addictions that people have, but it’s all just more evidence that addiction can’t be fit into one category. It is a spectrum, and for many, that spectrum has become a home. For some, however, that home may be permanent.

Why is it a thing? Like I previously stated, addiction is quite tricky to understand. To answer this question, I believe that an inquirer must ask a sufferer of this illness. We as humans must study and learn from the sources of our questions if we want valid answers. To me, it is a coping mechanism for years of trauma and guilt for who I am and how I was treated as a young child. To be honest, my addiction sprouted when I found the miracles of food. I would eat for every emotion and problem I had, especially sadness and guilt. When I was upset, I had food. When I was stressed, I had food. When I was happy, I had food. No matter what happened in my life, I knew food was there. Obesity has been an issue that I’ve struggled with for years, but I can never turn away from my rock, no matter how much it is killing me. It is not easy to get rid of an addiction once it has roped you in. Food roped me in tightly. So, to this question, I’d say that addiction is a thing because we as humans need something to lean on. This thing that we lean on is our “best friend”. This “best friend” is our addiction because we find it hard to let go. Our perception of friendship is different.

Why is it so common? I found this question to be the easiest to answer, in my own way, of course. Addiction is so common because it is a false sense of security that we as humans have provided ourselves to escape from the dreaded reality that is life. The pain that we all have that has plagued our hearts and minds, seems to go away when we are with our “best friend”. We as humans have been lying to ourselves. We’ve been telling ourselves that the things that we are addicted to are there to help us, when in reality, they are slowly killing us. Whether you want to hear it or not, every type of addiction is a slow killer. Endless hours of video games isn’t helping you. That cigarette isn’t going to relieve your pain forever. That shot of liquor isn't going to keep you going all night. That check and those hundred-dollar bills are only temporary. A man to his strength, a woman to her beauty, a politician to their power, etc. We have to learn to let go. These

addictions have been put into place to keep us from reaching the full potential that we are destined to achieve. Whether you achieve this potential is up to the individual.

Someone reading or listening to this essay may have noticed how I didn’t mention drugs or alcohol much at all. Drugs and alcohol are the first things that cross the human mind when the word “addiction” is heard. While those things are the causes for the majority of addictions, I wanted to highlight some addictions that aren’t talked about enough. I’ve often felt left out because my addiction has been left out of the conversation more often than not, as is the case for many other people and their addictions. I want whoever reads or listens to this to know that they’re not alone. You're not the only one who is struggling with emotional and/or binge eating. You're not the only one who is struggling with body image issues and trying to look perfect. You’re not the only one who feels the need to be powerful out of fear of rejection. You are not alone!

In conclusion, addiction is hard to explain, and even harder to overcome. However, you must stay motivated and take control of your life as much as you can before you fall too deep. Whether or not your addiction lasts is up to you. We are in this fight together and the last thing we need to do is wave our white flags. This is what addiction means to me.